I was just nipping to the shops down the road, granted I was running a little late as I’d just had a phone call that had set me in a bit of a tither.
I arrived at the shop in my car and thought I’ll risk it for a biscuit, I’m only going to be 5 mins and I won’t buy a ticket’. Ahhh no stay with me, this isn’t about getting a deserved parking ticket!
Jumping out of the car, it struck me. What could be worse than forgetting to change out of your slippers when going to the shops.
Remembering to change one foot out of your slippers. Hence, Fuckwit, Doofus, Derbrain, Knob or any other words to describe an idiot. Now please don’t be alarmed, I don’t thing I am on the slippery slope of losing all my marbles just yet….I’m just a fuckwit! Now this is a very small Town, and bound to be someone I knew in there. So my options were;
- Go home and change my shoes…………….really couldn’t be bothered with that!
- Wear the only other pair of shoes in the car, my lovely wellies.Noooo can’t do that, the sun’s cracking the pavements, I’ll draw even more attention to myself.
- Run round cartoon style, with feet going so fast I leave a trail blaze of fire and hope no one will notice…….. possible..
- Fein a limp with my slippered foot, and if anyone asks just say my foot is too swollen to get a shoe on.
I’m a child of the 60’s, when everyone was having free love and hippies, so I did this;
I know what you’re thinking, good save, good save! It was actually quite liberating! All I needed was a daisy chain in my hair. Got my sliced ham for tea anyway. Happy Thursday!