On a recent holiday to Majorca with my family, I have never seen a better display of stereotypical behaviour of different countrymen.if we were having coffee.

Now, our group were all travelling from England and all but one were British, one was Zimbabwean. But we’re all family. I’m sure anyone seeing us arrive, Brits abroad, 8 adults and 6 toddlers prayed they weren’t accommodated anywhere near us. After all we’re were bound to all be lager swilling, loud and moaning English with bad table manners weren’t we? Maybe we were, but none of us drank lager (cocktails were our beverage of choice!)


We didn’t moan (much). Although one of my daughters had a full on tantrum (she’s 30 ) in the street due to our lack of organisation. It was actually quite funny, if a little embarrassing. We were on holiday, who needs a schedule?

Our table manners aren’t bad, but you can imagine the scene with 3 x 2 year olds and 3 x babies all on baby led weaning. Yes, they did make a mess, but we always attempted to pick up any mess from the floor/table etc.

We are quite loud when we get together, not in a beer swilled state, just we chat a lot and laugh a lot!! So maybe we are pretty typical English, but I like us.

The places I tend to choose for holidays, tend to have quite a lot of Germans. I always like this as Germans have quite high accommodation standards. The resort we were at was probably 60% German, 15% French, 15% Spanish and 10% British. A stereotypical German? The towels, yes it has to be the towels!! Do they never sleep? Now I do get up very early on holiday, I like half an hour or so on my own, before it gets too hot to go for a walk or get a coffee. But no matter what time it was the Germans were all descending like locusts to put their towels out on the sunbeds. Yes it really does happen, and they’re so darn good at it!! I do have to admit, I got sucked into doing the same, after all were were a party of 14, so on my early morning walk, I would whizz round all my families balconies and grab their towels and get us a group of sunbeds. It really was a needs must, it was the only way we could all be there to keep an eye on the bases near the water. My only other observation is they didn’t smile a lot. This could be to do with the Euro football being on and their exit from the competition.

So onto the French. No, I didn’t see any hooped shirts, berets or onions hung round their necks. However, I did see emotional dramatics. Particularly one evening, as we were sat outside our apartments, all children in bed, adults having a cocktail and a chat, a young French girl about 17 years old walked past. Now in our group there was a police sergeant and a Nurse. The forever eagle eyed police sergeant spotted this young girl collapse to the floor. He ran up to try to help. The girl wasn’t moving and the nurse in our group was called for. She checked all the usual and looked a little confused. Her pulse and reps were all totally normal. She said “if it’s a faint it’s very unusual as nothing appears wrong”. My other daughter, who speaks very good French was managing now to get a few words out of the girl. The Hotel staff were trying to locate her family. Eventually her mother turned up, and was obviously very unphased by the girls behaviour as if it was a normal occurrence and just asked her not to do this, as they were on holiday. She explained she didn’t want to go home. The crowd that had gathered began to disperse as they could see the girl was fine and it was more a family matter. We went back to our patio areas. The girl sat up, very upset, sat on the floor crying and demanding the police were called. They weren’t and next morning she had gone, so presumably her Mother had managed to get her back to the apartment. A lot of Drama and emotions. Stereotypical French?

And the Spanish? They were on their home turf. Their food was great, their English, not so good. Spanish aren’t very good at languages. They appear relaxed and smiley. Not a lot else I observed about them.

Each and every one of us has different traits, I don’t mean to give offence to anyone, it’s just my lighthearted take on what makes our culture different and so interesting. We’re all Europeans and make the world so interesting. I am great believer in the fact we have to be able to laugh at ourselves, goodness knows the rest of Europe is having a laugh at our British political mess at the moment! I do hope we can all remain friends.

I can’t end a piece like this without mentioning the atrocities in Nice, this weekend. My and all of the Worlds thought are with France, the victims and their families. I have no words, just too awful. Love you France.


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